this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
