honey bunches of taint.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
