So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize