Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Randomize
