You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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