He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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