just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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