Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I have aggressive nipples.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
