ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
