The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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