This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize
