I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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