We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize