super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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