im gay
i know
yea but for you.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
