its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize