Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Randomize
