All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I want to fling myself into the sun
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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