Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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