im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
