She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
