Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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