I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
