I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
