I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
