I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
