Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize