Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Randomize
