there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Two words: blizzard sex
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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