Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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