Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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