I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize
