the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize