paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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