I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I wanna passion pit in your ass
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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