It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
we made out on top of his cat.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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