Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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