just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
