I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Im part way to drunk.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
