Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
