I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
