How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
