I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
