you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
