i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
