WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
