I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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