normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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