you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Randomize
