found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize